Long time no see

A drunkard needs no audience. Once the alcohol strikes the right chords, the performance starts. For instance, there was this "chair"man at Harris Jeyaraj's concert last week. Santosh and me were seated in the first row of our bay and right in front of the giant LED screen put up there. Suddenly, an obviously drunk guy jumped in front of the screen and started dancing like crazy. He then picked up an empty chair and was going great guns with it. We immediately named him the "chair"man. He didn't care if someone was looking. He just wanted to dance. Seconds later, a creepy guy came and stood in front of us, one hand placed on his hip and the other hanging by the side. I was actually scared for a moment. I wasn't sure what he was going to do. He was just standing there. Was he going to jump? Pounce? Dance? What? Then, I looked towards the direction he was staring. I realized that he was posing for a photo. I told Santosh and we weren't sure if it was the guy or the way he was standing or the "chair"man effect, we just broke into such a big laughter. We were just uncontrollable. Immediately as the poser guy walked back, another guy came and stood in the same pose. I did not need to turn back to realize that this was the previous poser's friend (who was taking the photo before). We laughed even hard. And the family guy next to us finally understood why we were laughing and joined us. I have had lots of lighter moments in the past few months, but that was an all time best. I'm totally off topic (but Santosh wanted me to write about this).

So, a drunkard needs no audience and my blog used to be like that. There was a time when I loved to write here. I used to make up topics even if I had none in mind. However, I get so many ideas while driving or sitting idle at work or eating in a restaurant but, I'm just not able to write. Maybe my job (even though I'm totally vetti right now) has made me like this. As such I'm not a self motivated person. People who know me will know that if I'm doing something, there is something about it that makes me happy. Sometime last year, I decided I'll never write about my personal life and I haven't written much since then. Maybe that bragging quality of mine was my muse to write here. I don't know why I'm trying to maintain a low profile these days (thanks to FB, I haven't pulled that invisibility cloak fully on).

This is why you shouldn't suck at handling changes. Changes! Again, I have written so much about that. Changes, small or big, I freak out big time. I raise the panic button over and over. This time it was my Dad. We drive each other so mad and keep fighting for at least 30% of the day (we sleep for 30% and don't see each other for the other 40%). He left to Kuwait last week. Staying alone is not new to me, but, we fought so much in the last two weeks of his stay in Chennai that the house is awfully silent. There are a series of events that happen at such situations.

As usual, I first tried to deny that it feels weird (which if I hadn't done I wouldn't have had any problem in first place). The next stage is a short time frame of loneliness which has three states of mind. 1) Blaming yourself for everything, 2) Blaming everyone else for everything and 3) Pissing off the closest things you have for company. In a week's time I have successfully gone through all the three states. I guess I have set things right. Anyways, after that it's the buck up and get a life stage which pretty much is slang for back to normalcy. And hence this post.

Tagging Vibushan and Vasundhara who also share similar behavior from time to time (but I still claim top spot for pissing off people). Ok, Vibushan I heard the "Dawg" you just said. :P

Coming back to topic (I seriously doubt if I had one), recently, I stumbled on to a blog called the The Writer's Mess (thanks to VJ), which had lot of chapter wise stories. I read a couple of them. One, My sister's Daughter which was really good in the start, but lost track of the plot somewhere towards the fag end. And the other, Whodunit which was decent for a crime story. Either way, it was good time pass.

This has kinda inspired me to try my hand on a couple of stories too. I have so many plots in mind, but in all cases just the first chapter. I'm just in a fix if I should start with cliched romance or 'Castle' inspired crime thrillers or 'Lost' inspired fiction. I guess I will make up my mind by this weekend. From my past experiments of such starts, I guess, from Monday my project work would commence, in which case you may not have to put up with it. Lets see.

Predominantly, the idea is to try and regain the want to write here more often. Also, I'm running an experiment to see if I can, at some stage of my life, learn to stick to a schedule (which I hate). Well, if you are receiving mail updates, I hope you'd read the stories and give me feedback. If everything goes as planned, I should start tomorrow.

Tomorrow, October 17th, also marks the birthday of my lovable sister Swathi. Maybe, if I start it on her b'day I'll be as determined as her to keep writing.

Happy Birthday Swathi! :) This birthday is double special for you, one obviously because of Diksha. The other? I'll wait before I dedicate an entire post for that. I'm sure you know what it is. :) Have a great birthday!

23

So, this is how it feels to turn 23??

Being a Leo

 

I'm a proud Leo. I feel so strongly about it because I see this great mindset match with people who are Leos too. I'm not a fan of astrology and don't care about the negatives of the same. But, it is always great to believe in positive thoughts and good ideals. I fit into most of the categories of a Leo. Dominant, organized, attention-craving, naughty and the list goes on.

So, Whats up?
Looking back is a tricky thing to do. Who doesn't have regrets when he is 23? I shouldn't have chosen this course; what was I thinking? It shouldn't have discarded my passion at its learning peak. Should I have told her earlier; Would that have made any difference? The whole attitude change I went through, I don't think it was worth it. Why am I working on something that I don't care about? A few of them at this age. But, its not only about the regrets. Well, at least not today. Its about hope. Its about commitment. Its about reality. Its about passion. I usually promise myself a lot of things this day, every year. Except last year, I've never kept any of those promises.

I've gotten bored of this promise deal. In the practical world, not all promises can be kept. I want to be practical. Aren't we missing out on the thrills of life? So, no promises (at least not aloud) this year. No hopes. No dreams. Lets get into some live action and see how things unwind. For a change, I'm going to practice "happy-with-what-I-have".

About today

To that note, when the clock strikes midnight, I'm wishing myself a very "Happy Birthday". I had planned to get myself an important gift yesterday, but, decided to postpone it. Certain things are more important than getting a gift at the right time. :) Its a good thing, also because I can dedicate an entire post as to why I wanted to get that and what I'm going to do with it.

Last afternoon, one of my friends asked me to suggest 10 of my favorite songs for some compilation he was working on. I gave him 5o songs in 5 mins. So, that kindled some real want to go back to my good old music. Spent three hours listening to marvels of our Indian musicians. And an episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. What more can I ask for????

Sweet Memories

Back to the looking back thing, thanks to technology and my uncle, I was lucky to see how my family celebrated my first birthday. Nothing like the feeling of someone wishing you from the beyond. Please note that I'm not SREERAJ and it was a spelling mistake made by I-don-know-who.

22 years ago..

I loved this clip. Hope you enjoyed it too. Its really good that people don't know what you'd grow into, else they'd be careful on what they invest on you.

Thanks to everybody who've been with me all these years. The little good I've done till now wouldn't have been possible without you people. I have no specific names. There are so many of them. I'd want each and everyone of you with me till the very end.

Chiju

August 10th 2010

PS: Having regrets when you are 23 is not a big deal. What's important is to revert each one of them down the line.

Happy Birthday

It was just this normal Monday for the rest of this world. For me, it was my first day @ work, in a company that I once thought - too much to expect, you are not gonna get a job there. 29th September 2008, the day I was all dressed up in formals, wore across my torso the business bag my Dad gifted me, got onto my bike like I was a hero and rode up to the foot hills of Thiruparankundram, Madurai.

It was not an entirely new environment. I knew 3 of my to-be colleagues beforehand - One my classmate, two a guy I met during the interview and three a guy from college whom I knew as this counter strike genius. I had met him during a counter strike tournament where my team returned unsuccessful (of course in the first round - well, I was in the team and what more can u expect).

Three of my teammates, who were geniuses too (in the game), were talking to him - His team had a one way ticket to the finals. He was surprised by the fact that Sparrow's team had come out in the first round and they were talking to each other in a language understandable only by the cream of a crowd called GAMERS. I maintained this low profile of looking away during the entire GAMERS stand-around conference.

Throughout the meet, this guy seemed to ignore me. Well, I thought he knew that talking to me would neither be knowledgeable nor interesting (almost half of the college knew that - news spreads u know). However, I did not bother that he din give a damn because I knew only his name and the fact that he is a Counter Strike Gethu. I met him a few of times after that. One memorable time was during the my Accenture placement. When they were giving out offers, the HR remembered that two of the guys selected can sing well. Me & another guy Raghul sang a number each and I definitely sang well enough to be noticed. He was running around helping the people who got the offers (He was the placement co-ordinator for his department I guessed).

Coming back (to 29-09-2008), we were all seated in this so called "reception" (the company called that compound so). I was sitting along with this classmate and the interview guy. We were just discussing how its going to be, checking out all the trembling trainees walk in, one after the other. Soon, this chap walked in. He was dressed like a professor, with glasses and all, appreciably formal with the ropes of his back clinging on to his body. I did not get him immediately.

Slowly it settled in - the counter strike guy. I had totally forgotten that he had been selected too. He came in with one of his classmates (I never knew him from college, but he had a very familiar face). The two came in and sat next to my classmate. They got to talking and started cracking jokes. I joined the conversation and it was going on fine until I added a line and they laughed at it.

He stopped laughing all of a sudden turned to my classmate and said, "Who is this?"

Well, I first thought that it was about this interview guy who was also a part of the conversation. But, the finger was pointed at me.

My classmate said, "Sriraj! CSE. Amrita. You don't know him?".

"Ettimadai campus?", he reacted.

"Yeah. We've met before. During the counterstrike tournament?", I tried to ring a bell.

And I quoted many more instances including the singing during Accenture placement. But in vain. It was like in F.R.I.E.N.D.S where Rachel's sister Amy thinks Ross sold her a philaphel. :(

And thats when I got to know Mr. Aneesh Ramaswami. Sorry sorry sorry. Aneesh Sphinx Ramaswami, the counterstrike wizard, the well learned professor, Atlas puli (not tamarind, Tiger), an excellent blogger, passionate biker (esp the bullet), F1 Kirukkan (Mental) and my brother (the best of all tags huh?).

Happy B'day Bro! I never knew I could know someone so well so fast! The best in your life is yet to come. Your day is just on its way. There's no better time than your birthday to tell you how grateful I'm, to have met you. Thanks for this wonderful ride for the past one and half years. Have a great time!

Happy B'day! Have a Blast! :)

Loads of love, affection & bums

Chiju

14th May 2010

:) :) :)

Marina Beach, Chennai, June 2009